Tag Archives: Success

What A Difference Thirteen Years Makes

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Earlier in the week, someone asked me when I started writing. I started the story in typical fashion for me and true to form, lost the thread and never closed out the discussion. This post answers the question and covers what’s happened since.

On November 3rd, Facebook informed me that thirteen years ago I attended An Evening With Kevin Smith in Kitchener, Ontario, Canada. It took eleven days, but I articulated the impact that night had on me in a blog post. You don’t need to read it before continuing this, but it might be interesting to read after. The relevant takeaway is that the post explains the answer to the question asked to me, and traces its origin back to the Kevin Smith show.

It took a few other fortuitous connections and a sliver of synchronicity, but if my writing journey is the fire, those connections were the kindling, and that Kevin Smith show was the spark.

Brick Walls, New Beginnings

I’ve long supported the adage that, “A rising tide lifts all ships.” I’m also a firm believer that no two people can take the same path and that, ultimately, we are the ones who get to define what success means for us.

In the thirteen years since that fateful evening do I feel I have been successful as a writer? If you would have asked me a year ago I would have said, “Somewhat.” Through the lens of today, however, the answer is a resounding, “Hell yes.” Why the change? What happened in that year to make the difference? To understand that, I need to recap the twelve years that followed the Kevin Smith show and give you some insight as to why my response was “somewhat”.

In (more or less) chronological order:

  • 2010: Blogged a lot. Immersed myself in the world of writing and met as many writers as I could
  • 2011: Failed attempt at completing a screenplay
  • 2011: Failed attempt at completing a novel
  • 2011: “Sold” a song for a podcast opening to Kevin Smith (he “art swapped” it for tickets to see him speak)
“Spunk” (a.k.a. Punk For Kevin)
  • 2012: Completed the first draft of a novel, No Fixed Address
  • 2013: Short story Losing Vern published in the Orange Karen: Tribute to a Warrior anthology
  • 2014: Completed a standalone novel, Hard Truth
  • 2015: Completed the first draft of No Known Cure, a sequel to No Fixed Address
  • 2015: Started writing for the OCH Literary Society
  • 2016: Ghost wrote two short stories and completed a standalone novel, Suburbia, and sold it to the same person
  • 2016: Completed my first nonfiction book, Bent But Not Broken: One Family’s Scoliosis Journey
  • 2016: Three freelance articles for the website The Good Men Project
  • 2016-2017: Two freelance articles for the website YourTango
  • 2017: Received my first publishing contract for BENT
  • 2017: Received a publishing contract for Hard Truth and the The “No” Conspiracies (No Fixed Address, No Known Cure, and three more)
  • 2017: Contributed three essays to the Stigma Fighters: Volume 3 anthology
  • 2018: Bent But Not Broken published
  • 2018: Hard Truth published
  • 2019: Completed the novel, No End In Sight
  • 2020: Sent the three completed The “No” Conspiracies books to my publisher
  • 2020: COVID. Publisher ceased releasing books (despite ebook sales growing in popularity. A decision that flummoxes me to this day)
  • 2021: Requested, and was granted, reversion of rights to The “No” Conspiracies series
  • 2021: Started exploring options for rights reversion for Bent But Not Broken and Hard Truth (this was not feasible as it would have cost me $1500 – per book – to get the rights back. I had no choice but to ride out the contracts to term; January and November 2023 respectively)
  • 2021: One freelance article for the website The Good Men Project
  • 2021: Short story accepted to an anthology (top secret project, publication date TBD)
  • 2022: Publisher decided to part ways with me and a handful of others citing COVID as the reason (still flummoxed at the rationale, but was happy as heck to be out from under a horrible contract)
  • 2022: Self-published Bent But Not Broken
  • 2022: Eleven freelance articles/posts for the website The Good Men Project
  • 2022: Completed the first draft of the standalone novel, Known Order Girls

By all accounts, those twelve years were pretty darn good. I was managing a full time job and a family with two small kids, a social life, a pretty serious bout of insomnia, and a severe concussion that had me off of work for months. Still, I carried feelings of inadequacy and laziness that have plagued me my whole life. I always felt like I wasn’t enough, that I had to work twice as hard to get half as far, that I wasn’t smart, that I was lazy, that I was capable of more.

Then came the diagnosis. Mild to moderate ADHD complicated by multiple traumatic brain injuries (TBIs). That explained a whole lot.

It was eye opening to finally understand why, despite all logical signs indicating otherwise, I’ve always carried these feelings of nonperformance, inadequacy, and lack of intelligence. In hindsight, I wonder why I never said anything. I mean, I know why I didn’t. Mental health wasn’t something you discussed openly. It wasn’t until I had friends talk about getting evaluated for ADHD and other non-neurotypical tendencies that I even entertained the possibility. Still, it took more than a year before I sought out someone to ask. I cannot understate how much it means and how helpful it is knowing why I feel the things I feel and why I am the way I am.

Half a dozen failed attempts at finding medication that works and another months long battle with insomnia that’s still rages later, I can look back at the last year and feel good about what I’ve accomplished.

In a moment of hyper-fixation during National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo), I wrote Near Death By A Thousand Cuts: A Humorous Memoir of Misfortune in the 30 days following my diagnosis. Writing a book in a month is no small task, but writing one that’s an account of injurious events in my life and finding the humour in them was rewarding and educational both in the introspective as well as practical senses.

Then I published it, recorded the audiobook for it, and marketed it. The publishing was fairly straightforward but I learned a lot about how to make that process as efficient as possible. Recording the audiobook was an adventure I care to never repeat. I could not have done it without the help of this Instructables article. The marketing and promotion was tough. How does a virtual nobody from Canada get people to buy an expletive-laden humorous memoir? Hard work, perseverance, and a bit of dumb luck.

With a limited social media presence that was virtually nonexistent anywhere but Facebook, I needed to grow my audience and find my public voice. In the twelve months since I finished Near Death, I doubled my Facebook followers from 1,000 to 2,000. I recorded hundreds of TikToks. I started engaging more with readers, writers, and other personalities I enjoyed. I made friends and leaned on them for advice and support. Really, I was just being myself, but publicly for everyone to see. The average self-published book sells 250 copies in its lifetime. I sold that many copies of Near Death in six months.

I found an editor for Known Order Girls through my very first writer friend, the guy who attended the same Kevin Smith show as me, and whose blog post about it inspired the blog post I wrote thirteen years ago. Some of these new connections are beta reading it for me. Others are cheering me on, and that feels so good. I’m going to try to query for an agent with it when my editor is done marking it up with her red pen. Even if I don’t find one and end up self-publishing it, I know that all the hard work I put in on Near Death will come in handy. In my mind, the book is already a success. I don’t know if people will think it’s good, but it’s definitely the best thing I’ve ever written and is a great source of pride.

It would be easy to point to the new followers, new friends, the finished magnum opus, and the book sales and say, that’s the difference between twelve months ago and now. While all are great things, that’s not why I changed my answer. The difference came from all the things I learned and the change in perspective that happened along the way. These are my accomplishments, I did them on my own terms, at my own pace, and I am proud of them.

Success.

Eyes On The Prize

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So here we are. We’re coming out of the third corner and into the home stretch. It’s been a tough race so far, sloppy to be sure, but not to worry because you were born to slop. You’re a mudder. Your father was a mudder. Your mother was a mudder.

[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r_YlS3SLoz8?rel=0]

So there it is, the finish line. The wire. The tape. THE END.

For some of you it’s in your past. You found that extra gear. You turned it up a notch. You dug deep. [Insert another metaphor for overachieving here]. My message to you is simple: CONGRATULATIONS!* You’ve done what not many people can do and written a novel in less than a month. You should be quite proud. Your job now is to take a moment to feel as awesome as you can about and then turn and look those still in the race and cheer them on.

For some of you the finish line is so far away you’re wondering if someone hasn’t gone and made the track longer while you were running. That would be a thoroughly jerk move for someone to pull but I can assure you that’s not what’s happened here. Something did happen though, and that’s okay. Life has a gnarly way of getting in the way of things you set out to do. Do not fret because you have a couple options at your disposal:

First, you can just pack it in. Put the pen down, close the laptop lid, open up your Candy Crush app. You gave it a good run and there’s absolutely no shame in calling it a day. You started this thing for a reason and by golly you’ll finish it at some point, or you won’t because it was not meant to be. Hold your head high because you entered the race in the first place.

Next, you can forge ahead. Full steam. Get those legs pumping and crack that whip. Put your head down and go. Find the extra gear. Turn it up a notch. Dig deep. [Insert another metaphor for overachieving here]. If that’s what you’re going to do, I admire your efforts. You got moxie, kid. Now finish reading this post and get back to work.

Finally, you can find a way to make something else your goal. Remember what I said a few weeks ago about defining success. You’re in charge of that, and no one else. Not some website, not your friends or neighbours, not even your mudder mother. Recreate your goal and work toward that.

For some of you the finish line is in sight and every stride down the home stretch brings it closer. Now, if looking at my NaNoWriMo buddy list and checking out the website is any indication, a great many of you are in this position. The finish line is unbearably close. Closer than two protons at the heart of a plutonium atom. Closer than that guy on the subway that has lots of room to his left but decides to stand to the right face to face with you trying to get your noses to touch. [Insert another reference for closeness here]. It is right there.

For all of you, there’s only one thing to do. Sit down and write. Set your goal some time sooner than it actually is. Me? I want to be done on Friday so I can have the weekend to rejoice (also, on the 30th I’m taking the kids to see Mythbusters Behind the Myths so that day will pretty much be a wash). So take your remaining words and divide by the number of days and write that amount every day. Just write. It will be hard, oh yes it will be hard. You’re tired, you’ve been running for more than three weeks, and your brain is starting to fail. You’re seeing things that aren’t there. Don’t worry about it, that gnome hitting on your muse has always been there. She’ll take care of you, don’t you worry. You’ve been a good scribe for the greater part of a month. Just. Keep.Going.

Even if it’s not a photo finish, I’ll have my camera ready. See you at the wire.

~ Andrew

* Side note about that word “congratulations”: I used to work at this place as a bus boy / dish pig / cleaner / etc… and part of the job was setting up the big sign out front with the message of the day. Every Saturday we’d have one or more weddings and someone would have to go out and put the message “Congratulations so and so” or “Congratulations to all the newlyweds”. Well, on the inside of the lid for the container that held all the large plastic letters someone wrote the word “CONGRATULATIONS”. You see, the job didn’t exactly attract the kids competing in the local spelling bee. Anyway, I always thought it was strange they didn’t have the big letter box sectioned off with some of the words that were just always used. It was mostly alphabetical but having a few of those words set aside would have been really useful. Plus, it would have made it easier to slip a “D” in there before the guy who always gave you a hard time and made you clean toilets went out to do the sign.

The Secret of My Success

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It’s November 2, 2014 and that means thousands of writers all over the world are hunkering down and trying to write a novel-length something before the end of the month. A “novel” is most loosely defined as: 50,000 words blarged onto a page of some kind. Our friends over at Dictionary.com have this to say about it:

“A fictitious prose narrative of considerable length and complexity, portraying characters and usually presenting a sequential organization of action and scenes.”

NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) is an organization that exists to ensure more books get out into the world. They tend to lean more toward my loose definition of the word “novel” and simply ask for writers to jot down 50,000 words (roughly 250 double spaced pages using Times New Roman 12 point font) in one month. Do this and you will, by their definition, be successful. You will “win”, and you will get a fancy certificate to prove it. Here are mine from the last two years:

The one from 2012 ended up being an entirely different book altogether when it was “done done”. That is to say after the 50,000 words ended up on the page I needed to write another 30,000 words to finish the story. Then I changed the name of the book and took out a big chunk of it and wrote another 20,000 words before finishing the first draft for good. 80,000 words total and it still needs a lot of work. 
The one from 2013 saw the 50,000th word hit the page on November 26 and I used the last 4 days to finish off the last 5,000 words from the previous project. So where is it now? Collecting dust. I hate the story. It’s taking forever to just get to the bloody point (pun intended: it’s a serial killer novel). That’s a bit of a lie. I actually like the story but I’m having a hard time actually telling it. So it will sit in a virtual drawer for a while and I’ll revisit it. Some day.
So, the big question is: have I been successful?
Arguments for:
I have two certificates from the Office of Letters and Light that say I was. I have a full on completed first draft of a novel, that’s actually being edited (or was until November rolled around again. I really want another certificate). 
Arguments against:
I don’t, however, have a book for sale on Amazon, no one has read more than two short chapters, and I have not received a penny for either of them (reader tip: that’s how most authors get paid. In pennies. Literally PENNIES a book. Remember that next time you think every writer eventually makes Anne Rice or Stephen King money).
Well here’s the thing: you don’t get to decide, at least not on my behalf.
You don’t. It’s as simple as that. When it comes to my success, you don’t have a say. I frequent Facebook quite a lot, and sometimes dip my head in the Twitter stream and I see lots of stuff that tells me, “Successful people do this!”, “How to succeed at this!”, “This many steps to succeeding at whatever it is!”, and do you know what? It’s mostly just shiny people with good teeth telling you that to meet their definition of success you need to be more like them. 

Ugh.

Now let’s be clear, if you are getting paid by someone to do a particular something then they get to decide. If you have a contract and the terms are laid out plain and simple (or as plain an simple as those things get) then that’s what decides. If you have defined success as some number of sales or some number in your bank account, then other people may be involved (by buying your book and/or giving you money), but it’s still your definition of success.

This year for NaNoWriMo I have defined success differently than in the past. Why? Because I can, that’s why. I am going to try to write a complete novel from a story perspective in at least 50,000 words. That means by the end of the month I will have something that can be edited. No loose ends. No missing chapters. “THE END” boldly written at the bottom. Oh, and I will do one blog post on each of the Sundays in the month of November as well (five in total).

I will get a certificate for the novel and I will proudly display it. It will represent my success this year and no one will be able to take that away.

So go out and define your success and then do whatever you have to do (legally, please) to achieve it. If you’re a writer then use NaNoWriMo however you want to help you down the road to success. Need to edit a few hundred pages? Good! Set daily goals and a monthly total and get to it. Need to finish off that novel you’ve been working on for the past 23 months? Good! Use NaNoWriMo to do it. Want to crank out 30 blog posts in 30 days? Good! You see where this is going?

You’re in the driver’s seat.

You get to decide.

If you will allow me a Yoda moment… In control of your destiny, you are.

Use The Force, Luke. Use The Force.

~ Andrew

It’s In You To Give

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I had a post all queued up about “success” for this week but something happened last Monday and Tuesday that has led me to move that post to next week – the first Sunday of NaNoWriMo. It’s a better post for the start of the 30 day novel writing campaign anyway. This week I want to talk about what happened last week and the profound impact it’s had on me, and how I feel about charity and giving.

A few months ago a Facebook friend of ours had to have surgery. Brain surgery. Real dangerous shit. He’s the real estate agent who drove us around for two days back in 2009 and showed us almost 30 homes and ultimately helped us buy the house we have lived in for the past 5 years. He even did the final walk through so my wife and I wouldn’t have to fly in from Ottawa to do it. We’ve stayed in touch on Facebook since then and followed the changes in his life, as he and his wife had their first child and then proudly announced earlier this year that another one was on the way.

During his surgery he almost died. He started to bleed and wouldn’t stop. There was something like a 1% chance of this happening and it did. It took blood donations from 60 people to save his life. They pumped 12 litres of blood into him to keep him alive. 12 litres. His body only holds 4. He came out of surgery without a single drop of the blood he went in with – 3 times over.

Healing and grateful to be alive he decided to give a little back and hold a blood drive down at the local Canadian Blood Services location in Waterloo and he asked all his friends on Facebook if they would consider donating.

I had low blood iron for the longest time and then was on some pretty fun medications after that and had never donated before. Being med free and with a healthy hemoglobin level right now the only thing stopping me was a healthy fear of needles and queasiness at the sight of blood, which seemed like really lame-ass excuses. So I booked my first ever appointment to donate blood for Tuesday of last week.

Then, in what can only be described as a karmic twist of the Universe, the Monday before my blood donation appointment my wife and I found out that our daughter does not weigh enough to bank her own blood before her surgery. You see, she has severe scoliosis and needs to have spinal surgery in the new year to have metal rods cemented and screwed into her spine to keep it straight. It’s a 10 hour surgery and if not everything goes as planned she’ll need blood. Better it’s her own than someone else’s too. Only now that was not possible.

My wife cannot donate because of some funky rule that prohibits donations from people who lived in France for more than 3 months during certain years. Seeing as she lived there for a year during one of those years she’s ineligible (something about mad cow disease and not being able to test for it until after you’re dead). I will be tested for compatibility (blood type, antibodies, etc…) and if I’m a match I will provide a directed donation to have on hand for my daughter’s surgery. I’ll only be able to donate a couple litres though. A worst case scenario would see her needing more than what I can offer.

That means there’ll be blood on hand from the blood bank. I really hope none of it will be needed, but it’s awfully reassuring that it’s there if it is in fact needed.

So on Tuesday I went in and donated blood for the first time. It was almost completely painless, everyone was very supportive, and I got to have juice and cookies afterwards. My friend was even there talking with all the people donating and thanking them. If I’m being completely honest, I felt really good about it. The best way I can describe it was that I felt like I was making an immediate and profound impact on somebody’s life. I went home afterwards proudly sporting my “First Time Donor” pin and feeling great (though getting out of bed the next morning was a challenge. I was really tired!)

I’ve been telling people this story ever since and am encouraging everyone to go find out if they are able to give blood, and if they are to please donate. It makes a difference. It saved my friend’s life and could very well save my daughter’s.

~ Andrew

P.S. I’m cross posting this on our family scoliosis journey blog. Read up on what we’re going through, and what it’s like to go down this path as part of the Canadian medical system.

Great Expectations

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This starts as a story of a writer who put out a tonne of stuff in several genres in a short period of time and didn’t achieve immediate success, so, she decided to pack it in and give up on her dream.

Here are the highlights:

  • 7 books released in 2 years
    • 3 self-published, 4 with a “publisher” of some kind, and 1 book owing
  • After 2-3 years she figured she would be successful. 
    • She is not so she is quitting. Not just quitting, but pulling her stuff off Amazon and buying back the rights to the books she no longer owns
  • Meanwhile, her spectacularly thrown hissy fit Facebook post was just littered with grammatical errors and spelling mistakes. 

Returning to her page several days after she thew in the towel I see that some of her friends have talked her out of it and she’s going to plow through. Good for her(?) Honestly, I’m not sure what to think. It seems like I’ve done more research for this blog post than she did in deciding to become a writer.

Image courtesy thaikrit at http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/

I took a look at her website and as far as I can tell this is a simple case of mismanaged expectations. Like the kids on American Idol who have been told by their parents that they’re the next Kelly Clarkson, this author had J.K. Rowling expectations when five out of six books in her portfolio are: two children’s picture books, two cook books, and a book of poems.

Now, I’m not sure what her definition of “success” is, but from what I’ve seen on her Facebook wall, it looks like recognition is pretty high up on the list. If that’s the case, then I might suggest that poetry, children’s picture books, and cookbooks might not be the quickest road to success. Certainly it’s possible, but: poetry world is a niche market at best, and finicky as hell; children’s picture books are the most saturated genre on the planet; and unless you’re actually a trained in the culinary arts or are Susanne Somers it’s going to be a long, slow road to success.

How a writer defines success is entirely up to them. How anyone defines success is entirely up to them. Personally, I’ve set modest goals with the intent of making them bigger and better as I move ahead with achieving each one. My expectations are set modestly and I have a good grasp on the reality of the situation. I understand that my goals may be just a little bit out of reach, but that’s okay. I can’t think of a single successful person (by any measure) that didn’t push themselves a little further. I understand that if I keep doing what I’m doing then I’m going to keep getting what I get.

Most importantly, I understand it’s going to take a bit of luck.

Image courtesy Michal Marcol at http://www.freedigitalphotos.net

Just to be clear, when I speak of luck this is the equation I have in mind:

Luck = Preparation + Opportunity 1

Also, 

  • You only get out what you put in
  • You  reap what you sow
  • You get what you deserve
  • Karma’s a bitch

Okay, maybe that last one’s a bit off topic but you get the idea (plus I love that particular expression). Someone mentioned to me the other day that they found me “inspiring”. Even though I was truly flattered, I had to laugh because it just so happens that I’m the laziest person in the world. I’m an excellent example of how one can achieve success but only if you allow it to take four times longer than it should.

That being said, I have more than a few successes to speak of (a couple in writing even!), and I know exactly how much time and effort I’ve put into achieving each one. You want to know something? If you do the research, constantly keep your eyes scanning for opportunity, and make your way to Carnegie Hall (practice, practice, practice) you’ll be successful. It’s that simple.

Image created and owned by David Samuel

But wait! You say you scribbled a few things down and didn’t achieve J.K. Rowling level success on the first try? Well then, you’ve got two choices: pack it in or keep trying, and if you choose the latter you had better not do the same thing over and over again and expect a different result. Not only will you continue to get what you get but you’ll start to look a little crazy in the process.

~ Andrew

Now What?

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The anatomy of a NaNoWriMo journey and what lies beyond

It’s somewhat convenient that December 1st falls on a Sunday this year as it allows me the opportunity to provide a post-NaNoWriMo analysis while it’s still fresh in my mind.

For starters, I won!

Not everyone did, however, but that’s okay. Unlike those techie jerks on Linux forums who berate and belittle those who don’t “get it” I am equally as proud of everyone who tried and didn’t make it to the 50,000 word mark as I am those who did. There were some truly inspirational stories this year to be sure, not the least of which is Cate, a high school girl in Ottawa who wrote 16,000 words on the last day to claim victory. Now that’s impressive on so many levels.

Cate’s Graph. Check out days 10, 12, 19 and 30!

What it takes for one person to meet the target is different for everyone. Notice I used the phrase “meet the target” instead of the word “success”? That’s because success is different for everyone as well. Success for me was getting 50,000 words written on a new novel while tying up a few loose ends on the novel I started last year. Yes, it was considered “done” but there were a couple gaps that needed filling and I wasn’t happy with it as it was. Not happy enough to say that I had finally written my first book, at least.

Regardless of what the measure of success is, if you were simply trying to hit a target (50,000 words or some other number) or if you were trying to polish off that long forgotten manuscript, or if you were simply trying to see what you were realistically capable of stringing together in the time you weren’t being a mom/dad/student/employee/vampire/zombie/werewolf/wizard/husband/wife/friend/hobbit/daughter/son; there are a few things that you’ll need if you’re going to pull it off:

  1. Desire
  2. Commitment
  3. Support

Much like any other journey, it starts with desire. Desire to see something, see someone, accomplish something, make a difference… In a nutshell, you have to want to get off your ass in the first place (or in the case of writing, sit your ass down).

Just starting isn’t enough, though. You have to continue. You must persist. You have to be more than dedicated. You have to be committed. You have to be a pig. Say what?! This is a common analogy in the Agile software development world. Think of your journey as breakfast. Who would you rather be, the chicken or the pig? The chicken is dedicated. The chicken will wake up every morning with the sun and give you an egg. The pig, however, the pig is committed. The pig quite literally has skin in the game. The pig is committed, and you need to be as well (if not as you go then quite possibly – though in a different sense – after).

Finally, you need support. I wrote back in January that while writing seems like a solitary practice it’s actually not. It requires interaction and support from a variety of people. Surrounding yourself with people that understand and appreciate what you’re trying to accomplish is absolutely necessary. A support network of people who have a genuine interest in what you’re doing is absolutely invaluable. This year I leaned heavily on my wife, kids, and a couple Facebook groups of like-minded crazy people and it was absolutely instrumental to my success.

So now what?

If your novel is done, take some time off and distance yourself from it. Stat revisions and edits in the new year sometime. If it’s not done then set a schedule and finish it. Me? Well, I’m shelving the novel that’s complete, hitting pause on the 60% of one I just wrote, and trying my hand at writing a screenplay. After the screenplay is done then this year’s novel will be finished and then I’ll start revising novel #1.

Whatever’s next up on your agenda, I wish you all the best with it. I can’t help you with the first two items on the list but I can definitely help you with the third one. Find me here, or on Facebook or Twitter anytime, and I wish you all good writing.

~ Andrew

An Open Letter to Writers

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Dear Writers,

At this early stage in my writing career I thought it would be a good idea offer some of my insights into this fabulous craft that we are all so passionate about. You’ll find that throughout this letter I have a fondness for certain phrases, have a certain style, and am wonderfully all over the place in the area of grammar and punctuation (my blog posts do not have the benefit of an amazing editor, or an editor of any kind, so you get what you get).

At this point I am convinced there are at least four things that every writer possesses:

  1. A desire to be a writer; 
  2. at least one idea; 
  3. a great support network; and
  4. something with which to write.

Naturally, to actually become a writer there are dozens upon dozens of other qualities, qualifications, and quirks you must possess, but in my opinion if you don’t have those four you’re not setting yourself up for success. Far be it for me, an unpaid, unpublished, part-time scribe to impart any advice; but I think those items are absolutely key – especially the third one. Contrary to the idea that writing is a solitary pursuit, I am finding that it actually requires quite a bit of input, feedback, and support from the many sources around me.

I am also in the extremely fortunate situation of having had a job working for someone else (and have since graduating from university), but for a lot of people writing is their job. It’s a very real one, and at the rate my daughter is reading books it’s a darned good thing they do it.

I have all the items from the list above and actually have something to show for it (writing wise) but I would only consider myself to be a part time writer. Due to my full time employment, my wife and kids, and all the activities that go along with them and the rest of the family and my friends, and all the costs and bills that come along as a result, I’m at the point that I need steady income in order to maintain the lifestyle I have chosen. I could cut back in a lot of areas and have some more time and money on hand but I suspect I’d be less fulfilled in many ways (hint: success and fulfillment have nothing to do with money).

There are times though, when I just feel compelled to create and this is where my support network really shines. I meet my commitments to my job and my family and in return they shower me with everything I need to bring my ideas to life. My job offers a work-life balance like none other. My wife will let me spitball ideas, or she will give me tips, or just sit and listen to me ramble, or she’ll just leave me the hell alone. Heck, she said she’d go to the gym on her own after the kids go to bed so I can have an hour a night to just sit and write. Speaking of kids, mine are the greatest source of inspiration a person could ask for. They breathe life into my words even on topics they can’t comprehend. My family is extremely supportive as well – especially my in-laws – and so are all my friends. I look forward to the day when some of them are beta readers for my novel (plus, I owe Neil Hedley a signature on his copy of my book at some point).

Unfortunately, I know some of you are actively discouraged from writing. Some of you are either published authors or aspiring to be, who have people in your life that would rather have you do something else. Anything else, in some cases. Your comments on this vary, but there seems to be an underlying theme: “When are you going to get a real job?”

Another common theme seems to be that many of these not-so-supportive comments come from the mouths of your family members: mothers, fathers, spouses, siblings, and the people closest to you. Now, I don’t know about any of your personal situations or have any of the history behind your interactions so I’ve only been exposed to one side of the story. If I have learned anything from my thirty[mumble] years on Earth, it’s that one side of a story is not enough to know the whole story. What I do know is that you are passionate about what you are doing, you are good at it, and you are remarkably supportive of others who choose to go down this path.

So I will close with this:

If you have the desire, the idea, and the something with which to write; and support is the only thing missing, then you have to do whatever you can do to find it. I’m not saying sell all your things, leave your spouse and kids, stop calling your mother, and move into a writer’s commune, but I do think you owe it to yourself to find that support and try to work it into your life.

I can promise you that I’ll do what I can to support you in a similar way that the people close to me are doing. I value the work that you do, and am grateful to have developed friendships with so many of you who do it.

~Andrew

Out With The Old…

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I don’t like New Year’s resolutions. Never have. However, I do think that as civilized people living in a free and democratic society we can collectively do a better job, and this becomes much easier to do if each individual does a little something different in an effort to improve. As such, last January I outlined a few goals for 2012 that went a little something like this:

Leverage some key P’s:

  • Patience 
  • Persistence 
  • Practicality 
  • Positivity 

So how’d I do? Well, I was pretty good at persisting, being practical, and staying positive but patience was a bit of a challenge. To be honest, it always has been so I didn’t expect to knock that one out of the park. For 2013 I plan on leveraging all of those things by doing all of these things:

  • Set goals outside my comfort zone
  • Think ahead more than one step
  • Think more about others
  • Breathe

If being off work for more than two months with a concussion taught me anything in 2011 it was that things do not happen overnight and there will always be setbacks. With that in mind, at the start of 2012 I vowed to do the following:

Work within my limits but always know that it’s in me to do more. 

So how’d I do? Well, I managed to get on stage and sing in front of more than 10 people – twice – and I got a new job and did many more things around the house and with my family than I every thought possible, and you know what? I can do more. So this year I plan on focusing my attention in a slightly different way in an effort to get more out the next 12 months (I will explain this in a minute).

Lastly, I committed to three things that supersede everything else:

Be a better father to my kids;
a better husband to my wife;
and a better friend to all the people in my life.

I think I succeeded on all of these fronts, but as the previous section indicates, I am capable of doing more. So, I will do more:

  • When one of my kids is nearby I will put my laptop or phone aside, and even if they are not desiring my attention, I will give it to them
  • When asked to do something by my wife, I will do it right then or I will set a reminder in my phone if it needs to be done later
  • I will get out and see my friends. This means one event every now and then as well as coffee or tea with individuals at lunch or whenever our schedules align. This also includes golf 🙂
  • I will buy some local art
  • I will read more books written by people I know and I will give them honest and constructive feedback. I would be forever grateful if they would do the same for me

As for the specific goals for last year, I failed to accomplish all but one (the Twitter goal). A couple of them could be considered successes with an asterisk but that’s not the point. The point is to be working towards something and to come closer to figuring out what I want to be when I grow up (without actually having to grow up).

When talking about my web presence with a friend last year he said I needed to focus on one thing; that between my blog… and writing… and photography… and music, that I was spread too thin. He was right. That’s why I’ve decided to focus 2013 on writing. Winning NaNoWriMo, getting a short story published, and seeing so many friends have so much success with their writing is more than enough to light a fire under my ass. Personal, professional, and family goals aside, any goal with a number on it this year has to do with writing. In case you care, here they are:

  • Finish Novel #1 + edit
  • Write Novel #2 + partially edit
  • Win NaNoWriMo (again)
  • Write 2 screenplays (based on the novels)
  • Write 3 short stories + edit
  • Write 1 blog post every week

After I succeed I will have written roughly 300,000 words, and at least a few times I will have the pleasure of writing “The End”.

So, here’s to a great beginning! All the best to you and your loved ones in 2013.

~Andrew